Experiencing Love in a New Way
I never experienced healthy love until I met my boyfriend. I never really talk about him much but, I just wanna brag about him real quick. At first, his love was too much for me to handle. Because I was so used to toxic love, I couldn’t appreciate a man being so nice to me, with no hidden motives. I would be looking for reasons to get mad at him or reasons that I should let him go. I realized that really it was me that was messed up, though. Talk about self sabotage. Could you imagine not feeling like you deserved to be loved unconditionally? Sheesh.
I had this distorted concept of how I felt that I wanted to be loved. If I didn’t receive it the way I wanted than he obviously didn’t love me, right? Wrong. This man has showed me over and over again that he loves me. No, he doesn’t go all out with rose petals on the bed, expensive jewelry, and all the other extravagant ways (my love language is not receiving gifts anyway). However, he shows love in so many other ways that I had honestly took for granted for a while unfortunately.
Appreciating Healthy Love
Since being pregnant, I’ve had some rough days and he has truly helped me a lot. This man has been washing the clothes and dishes, cooking, cleaning the house, and just letting me be me without ANY judgment. (He honestly was doing these things before I was pregnant). He has been so attentive to my needs.
Example: Last month, he told me he was going to Target. I was so upset in my head like “this dude really going to my favorite store without me?!” I bit my tongue because I figured he wanted some alone time. In the past, he would’ve definitely heard my mouth about not taking me to Target, though. However, I’m so glad I learned to just shut up. When he came back in the house, he took a pregnancy pillow (Snoogle) out the bag. I instantly teared up. He heard me complaining about how uncomfortable I was in the bed. It’s always the little things.
Recently, I have been having meltdowns where I’m crying to the point where I’m making myself sick. In order to make sure I’m good, he calls out of work to stay with me. I’m getting emotional just talking about it. But, he doesn’t make me feel bad for anything, even if it’s something silly. He might only say 3 words to me, but those 3 words comfort me.
To have him in my life is truly a blessing. I’m even more blessed that he is the father of my unborn child. Birthing a child into a loving, healthy environment is so important to me. I am so glad that I didn’t wait to late to appreciate him. The love that he shows me is the love that he deserves back. He makes me want to step my game up because sometimes I’m slacking.
My Charge to You
Healthy love may come to you in non conventional ways. Do not block yourself from something good because of what you’re used to. If I were to continue trying to pick him a part, I may have missed out on a love that is so pure. I encourage everyone to reflect on yourselves because sometimes, we may be the problem.
Here is a book to help you make your love last by understanding your love languages…
Until then, keep sipping…